Friday, October 19, 2007


Oh...I thought you said "goats."

Below is a copy of an email I just received:

GhostControl ( to me
show details 12:59 pm (22 minutes ago)

Three houses in your neighborhood have had high amounts of spiritual activity. Our instruments show strange energy radiating directly from your home.

Please dont wait until it is too late!

Click Here to find out if your house is Haunted.


Click Here

Of course, I realize those odd noises in my house are predominantly caused by leprechauns, unicorns, and the occasional centaur. However, I have been hearing chains clinking lately, and short of my roommate indulging in some sort of dungeon fetish play, I have to suspect ghosts or an escaped convict.

Feeling it was my duty to my loyal readers to investigate further, I followed the link to see what I could find out. I was asked a series of in depth questions, such as my city of residence, if I had recently broken a mirror, if I found that things were randomly missing from my house, and if I would like another beer (okay, I made that last one up, but I would like one, thank you very much.)

Then, at the end, I was asked to enter in my cell phone number and they would text me the results...for $9.99 per month...maybe in case my house isn't haunted this month, but the Ghost of Christmas Past shows up in 8 weeks or so?

Thanks anyway, I'll just make a deal with the centaurs to keep the ghosts at bay, and ask my roommate to keep the chain clinking to a minimum next Tuesday (We have a carefully orchestrated fetish calendar at our house. Wednesday is reserved for Melissa and I to engage in costume play. I get to dress up as Cinderella this week, and she's my evil stepmother. Could get kinky.) Enjoy the weekend, and feel free to share any haunting or fetish play stories in the comments section.

JT out.

I'm glad you didn't fall for that crap. You're obviously smarter than that. Besides, I provide the same service for $6.oo a month. Let me know.
Make it $4.50, and we've got a deal.
What?? You think I don't have overhead costs to think of?!?!

Good day sir!
I said good day!!!
using the I said good day line is a staple of my comedy.
That exchange was hilarious.
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