1. The older I get, the more severe my reaction to MSG gets. Two years ago, I could eat food from any Chinese place and be fine. Starting last winter, I noticed that every time I ate Chinese food, I would start to have a very rapid heartbeat and drymouth about an hour later. After doing some research online (between watching midget porn and cyber-stalking Matt Dillon,) I discovered that I was reacting to the MSG. Why I suddenly started reacting to it is a mystery, but I'll chalk it up to the same reason my beard is better described as salt and pepper in color: I'm devastatingly handsome. I usually try to ask for MSG-free dishes, but I forgot to today when Melissa bought me lunch (also because I'm devastatingly handsome.) Now I feel like I've consumed eleventy-billion cups of gas station coffee and eaten twelve pounds of cotton balls.

2. Saturday Night Live is definitely on an upswing. I've been noticing it over the past two years. The young cast they have is incredibly funny (except you, Kenan Thompson...but you're improving.) The following video clip proves it. Sorry the audio is slightly out of sync, but it was the best clip I could find (edit: I found the official clip from NBC...much better. Thanks, NBC.)

I hope everyone enjoys their weeks, it's going to be balls-out for me since it's both a short week and the end of the month. On second thought, it's going to be balls-in because it's really cold right now. Let's just say "busy."

JT out.